Good morning, friends. Calls. That is what is on my heart today. Over the course of the past 10 days, I have received three phone calls that sent my heart racing and immediately caused the tears to flow once again. And frankly, it has caused me some introspection that I want to share with you this morning.
The first call was from our son, Kevin, informing me that our special needs grandson, Jackson, had broken off a spoon while eating his lunch and swallowed a piece of it, jagged edges and all. They were on their way to the ER. After x-rays and doctor’s evaluation, it was determined he would be fine. Whew. Crisis averted.
The next “call” actually came in the form of a text from our daughter, Christl, this past Friday, with these scary words about our grandson, Reece: “Reece flipped over a bouncy house and landed on his head on concrete. He was knocked out for 15 seconds. Heading to hospital.” And, immediately the tears were flowing. After an ambulance ride, a CT scan, and many hours in the ER, he went home with a diagnosis of a concussion and a fractured wrist and instructions for Mom to call a concussion specialist and an orthopedic doctor on Monday. Another crisis point that could have been so much worse.
Then there was the call from my brother just yesterday informing me that our Mom had fallen and he was taking her to an Urgent Care facility. She has fractured a bone in her foot and will be seeing an orthopedic doctor this afternoon. Not sure what the outcome of that one will be yet.
As I thought about my reactions to these events, I realized that fear has once again become my go-to response to these “crisis calls” that are a part of life. Fear instead of trust. Fear of the what-ifs. Fearing the worst. In God’s providence, my friend-I-haven’t-met-yet, Melanie DeSimone, the creator of the Facebook group I am a part of, Heartache and Hope, posted these words this very morning:
“It doesn’t take much for a heart to fear the worst. But for someone who knows exactly what the worst feels like, there’s a whole other level to this terror. Fear of what you don’t know can’t hold a candle to fear of what you know by experience.”
These recent calls brought back immediately the pain of two other calls, one on December 20, 2013, when our son, Jeremy, informed us that his baby girl, our sweet granddaughter, Serenity, had run ahead of us to heaven during her afternoon nap. The second call, the most painful and devastating of all, came on October 7, 2017, when our daughter-in-law called to tell us Jeremy wasn’t breathing and EMS was there. And our worst fears were confirmed when we arrived on the scene and were informed by a police officer that we couldn’t go in until “the coroner arrived.” Yep, that’s how I found out my son had also run ahead of us to heaven. Calls. Hard. Pain. Fear. The worst.
But, again in God’s good providence, the devotional in Jesus Always on Saturday made me think of another “call” and I realized that how I answer this call will determine how I answer all of the other calls. This call is from Jesus Himself who, in Matthew 11:28-30 calls me to “Come and find rest” in Him when the calls of this life leave me weary and burdened. Then there is the call in Isaiah 55:1-3 where God calls me to “Come and drink” and find my rest and my salvation in Him and Him alone. Here is how Sarah Young puts it: “Don’t get trapped in a posture of demanding to know ‘Why?’ That is the wrong question to ask Me [Jesus]. The right questions are: ‘How do You want me to view this situation? And ‘What do You want me to do right now?’ Trust Me one day, one moment, at a time.”
So, when the crisis points hit, and they will because we live in a fallen world, what will I do? Will I let fear own me, or will I hear the call of my Savior who says, Come, “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10). My answer to that call will determine the course of my life. Will I be paralyzed by fear or will I answer God’s call to come and trust Him? I am a work in progress on all of this, so I will say to you, my friends, thank you in advance for your patience.
